Pop quiz: What do you get when you team up a matchmaker from Mumbai with a chef from Dubai? The first wedding of 2020.
Here’s a quick tete-a-tete with this newly wedded couple:
What were you looking for (in a partner)?
NP: I’ve always looked for someone who could make me laugh. More importantly, I’ve never wanted to pretend or feel pressured to be a personality that I’m not. We all want someone we can comfortable around, and just ‘gets’ us.
AG: I was looking for someone who understood me and liked me for who I am as a person.
You physically met after a few phone calls. What was the first date really like? What were pre-date jitters? (be honest!)
NP: I flew down to Dubai to meet him (on the pretext of a long overdue “work” trip). He went all out and planned our first date. A fancy car ride to the venue, my favourite cuisines (he knows of my love for truffles and picked a swanky Italian restaurant) and there was Tiramisu (our fave dessert) of course! I felt absolutely no jitters even when I met him in person for the first time. For once, I felt at home, almost instantly.
AG: They weren’t any pre-date jitters, but once I hugged her at the airport when I met her for the first time, I shivered a little. And that was a big tell because it’s never happened before. I knew this encounter would turn into something special.
How did you know that he/she is ‘the one’?
NP: I think it was that one coffee date we went on in Mumbai about two months after we first met. A quick “let’s catch up for coffee” turned into a four-hour long chat on “what should be the next step.” He was proactive, completely ‘into it’ and we were thinking along the same lines, without having to prompt each other. It was also the fact that we had a very similar upbringing; I saw him spend time with his parents, their camaraderie was so similar to what I share at home with my family. I knew I wouldn’t have to try too hard to fit in.
AG: Our first meeting was an indication of things to come (love the confidence, AG!), but I guess our meeting again in Mumbai and having a conversation late into the night was when I knew she was the one.
What does your partner do to lighten up your mood?
NP: I’m married to a chef! He doesn’t have to try too hard to lighten up my mood. Breakfast in bed pretty much does the trick.
AG: She says the right things at the right time and that honestly is all I need at that time.
What do you find most endearing about each other?
NP: The fact that he knows when to just let me be. He’ll push, he’ll persevere in his own subtle ways. He does it with knack, without making you feel pressured, yet not left alone. It’s amazing to feel cared for, without being overwhelmed.
AG: She understands people. She’ll strike an interesting conversation with absolutely anyone – right from her four year-old niece to my 94 year-old grandfather. She knows how to make people feel important, and give them the respect they deserve. It’s heartwarming to see how much love she has in her to share with people she cares about.
How soon after an argument can you laugh about it all?
NP: We haven’t had too many, yet! But I have broken into fits of laughter whilst we are arguing. Doesn’t help the cause, really, especially when I’m the one who started the fight in the first place!
AG: Pretty soon; though we don’t bicker much (touchwood). But we reason things out which make it easier for us to stay off fights in the first place.
In what ways are you most alike, and different?
NP: I think we are very similar. We are both independent Bombay kids who live away from home, in a different city, but miss home, family and maa ka khaana almost all the time. But more than anything, it’s our vision for what we want from life and our relationship, that makes us similar in more ways than one. How are we different? A day off from work for him means 10 hours of extra sleep, his PlayStation and a home-cooked meal. Whereas I’d like to ideally spend my day off, outside the house and definitely not in front of any kind of screen!
AG: We are alike in our thinking and the way we perceive things, but quite different in our hobbies / what we like doing and want to do.
What are the little / big things that this relationship has changed about you, and your outlook?
NP: Because I have a partner whom I feel comfortable around, I have learnt that it’s okay to reach out for help. Nothing is too small or too big.
AG: She helps me see things positively and objectively, rather than acting impulsively and jumping in. Also, I have received a lot of compliments for my brand new wardrobe and sense of dressing (I was paid to say this) – but honestly – credit where it’s due!
What is the best part about being together?
NP: Having someone loving to come home to, every single day!
AG: The being together part, after that everything just flows.
One piece of dating advice that you’d like to share:
NP: It’s okay to take your time to ‘figure things out.’ But if it’s all happening too soon (speaking theoretically), don’t let that doubt your feelings and decision. When you know, you know.
AG: You don’t have to always agree with someone’s thoughts, ideas, likes and dislikes. All you need is a basic sense of common understanding, and you’re good to go.
Images courtesy: Kodoclicker